While the word “goop” technically means nothing, it means something. To us, it is an insult to the depth of humanity. This website is dedicated to being the opposite of that. It is equal parts scary ghost stories, contemplative narratives, and borderline delirious ideas on ways to fix the world. All essays are written by the site creator, an anonymous space alien, unless otherwise stated. Until Gwyneth Paltrow sues, this is notgoop.com.